Sparkle Chapter Three?
Oct. 24th, 2009 07:55 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alliancesjr@alliancesjr: I'm up early, I'm grumpy, so I'll go ahead and do Chapter 3 of Twilight.
Chapter Three
@alliancesjr: Oh, so THAT'S why Bella hates snow. Not because it's the Godless North, it's because she doesn't want to DROP DEAD FROM DROPPING.
@alliancesjr: ...and she's already describing him as perfect and yearning after him. In Chapter Three.
@alliancesjr: I mean, what happened to the good ol' building tension, Star-Crossed Lovers who are Thrown Into Circumstances Beyond Their Control?
@alliancesjr: Y'know, like Beauty and the Beast, or Aladdin and Jasmine, or Sid and Nancy, or Thelma and Louise?
@alliancesjr: ...although, is it wrong if I find the image of Bella FIGHTING FOR HER LIFE to get across a patch of ice kind of endearing?
@alliancesjr: EPIC STRUGGLE. EVERY STEP AS IF HER LIFE DEPENDED ON IT. "AWESOME I AM IN MY TRUCK shit i need to go back out and use the snow brush"
So this part is actually pretty believable for someone who spent most of her adolescent life in Arizona, and for someone who is a huge klutz. My own sister will often be running down the hallway, and we in the family room directly underneath that hallway will hear a huge THUD. One of us will hold up a hand and visibly count to three, and we'll hear "I'm okay!" floating downstairs.
@alliancesjr: KILLER DEATH VAN
@alliancesjr: (Have you heard my new metal band, Killer Death Van? We're opening for Outrageous Flavor.)
@alliancesjr: ...Edward glided through the doors. GLIDED. I'm sure you did, twinkletoes.
This may be a bit of a stretch, but I'm seeing some pretty flamboyant adjectives, adverbs and verbs being applied to Edward. (SHUT UP DEBBIE I AM READING THIS THE WAY I WANT TO READ IT, I KNOW YOU THINK THE BOOKS ARE GOOD.)
@alliancesjr: Aaaand Bella decides that she knows more about medicine than the hospital staff. "I DON'T LIKE THIS NECK BRACE I WILL FLING IT ow my neck"
@alliancesjr: Bella™. Better Than You Since... *flipcheck* 2005.
(Yes, I know the alt-code for ™ off the top of my head. Shut up, I actually use it a lot in situations like this.)
@alliancesjr: Musical voice.
@alliancesjr: I BET.
@alliancesjr: ...Bella's intuition stems from the POWER OF OBSERVATION. Nice.
Here we are at the Hospital Scene of Edward Does Not Read The Stalkers' And Rapists' Handbook At All, No Really He Doesn't. "Nobody will believe you, you know" is SUCH a wonderful phrase to say creepily and condescendingly.
@alliancesjr: ...you don't stare down a "destroying angel", Bella. You GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.
@alliancesjr: What's a Destroying Angel, anyway? Is it like a wrecking ball with wings? Is Gabriel out there with a megaphone saying "No, that one!"?
@alliancesjr: "What we got here, boss, is a couple-a cities with really weak foundation work. Total non-union job. We gotta tear the whole thing down."
@alliancesjr: "I don't know who they hired to build Sodom and Gomorrah, but it's a real corker of a situation. TEAR IT DOWN, BOYS."
...sometimes I think about two girls tangenting and then I tangent all by myself.
@alliancesjr: At least she knows she's completely bonkers, though. I'll give her that.
End of the chapter. We'll get more into it again later.
Chapter Three
@alliancesjr: Oh, so THAT'S why Bella hates snow. Not because it's the Godless North, it's because she doesn't want to DROP DEAD FROM DROPPING.
@alliancesjr: ...and she's already describing him as perfect and yearning after him. In Chapter Three.
@alliancesjr: I mean, what happened to the good ol' building tension, Star-Crossed Lovers who are Thrown Into Circumstances Beyond Their Control?
@alliancesjr: Y'know, like Beauty and the Beast, or Aladdin and Jasmine, or Sid and Nancy, or Thelma and Louise?
@alliancesjr: ...although, is it wrong if I find the image of Bella FIGHTING FOR HER LIFE to get across a patch of ice kind of endearing?
@alliancesjr: EPIC STRUGGLE. EVERY STEP AS IF HER LIFE DEPENDED ON IT. "AWESOME I AM IN MY TRUCK shit i need to go back out and use the snow brush"
So this part is actually pretty believable for someone who spent most of her adolescent life in Arizona, and for someone who is a huge klutz. My own sister will often be running down the hallway, and we in the family room directly underneath that hallway will hear a huge THUD. One of us will hold up a hand and visibly count to three, and we'll hear "I'm okay!" floating downstairs.
@alliancesjr: KILLER DEATH VAN
@alliancesjr: (Have you heard my new metal band, Killer Death Van? We're opening for Outrageous Flavor.)
@alliancesjr: ...Edward glided through the doors. GLIDED. I'm sure you did, twinkletoes.
This may be a bit of a stretch, but I'm seeing some pretty flamboyant adjectives, adverbs and verbs being applied to Edward. (SHUT UP DEBBIE I AM READING THIS THE WAY I WANT TO READ IT, I KNOW YOU THINK THE BOOKS ARE GOOD.)
@alliancesjr: Aaaand Bella decides that she knows more about medicine than the hospital staff. "I DON'T LIKE THIS NECK BRACE I WILL FLING IT ow my neck"
@alliancesjr: Bella™. Better Than You Since... *flipcheck* 2005.
(Yes, I know the alt-code for ™ off the top of my head. Shut up, I actually use it a lot in situations like this.)
@alliancesjr: Musical voice.
@alliancesjr: I BET.
@alliancesjr: ...Bella's intuition stems from the POWER OF OBSERVATION. Nice.
Here we are at the Hospital Scene of Edward Does Not Read The Stalkers' And Rapists' Handbook At All, No Really He Doesn't. "Nobody will believe you, you know" is SUCH a wonderful phrase to say creepily and condescendingly.
@alliancesjr: ...you don't stare down a "destroying angel", Bella. You GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY.
@alliancesjr: What's a Destroying Angel, anyway? Is it like a wrecking ball with wings? Is Gabriel out there with a megaphone saying "No, that one!"?
@alliancesjr: "What we got here, boss, is a couple-a cities with really weak foundation work. Total non-union job. We gotta tear the whole thing down."
@alliancesjr: "I don't know who they hired to build Sodom and Gomorrah, but it's a real corker of a situation. TEAR IT DOWN, BOYS."
...sometimes I think about two girls tangenting and then I tangent all by myself.
@alliancesjr: At least she knows she's completely bonkers, though. I'll give her that.
End of the chapter. We'll get more into it again later.
